Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
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