i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
