I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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