they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
