Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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