dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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