dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
ok first of all what the fuck
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
