You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize