I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
