i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
