I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
