Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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