Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
