i just wanna soil my oats bro
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
