he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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