im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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