He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
