i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
