just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize