Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
