It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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