"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
