dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Less talking, more tequila
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
