Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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