Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
then he tried to convert me to islam
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
