yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
