I skipped work to stalk him.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
