my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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