so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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