I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
