I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
