His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize