youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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