Will you blow on my dice?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
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