If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
