I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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