when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
