Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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