so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
