im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
