When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize