I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
