i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize