He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
