I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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