She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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