spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
