I need help removing her.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize