and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
