I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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